I’m taking another much needed break from my blogging silence to share a story.
Thirteen years ago seems like a lifetime when you speak the words. But thirteen years married to Adam, feels like a beautiful blink.
I was 22, he was 24 and judging by today’s average we were just kids, embarking on a trip together down the aisle. A reading I recall most from our ceremony was from Kahil Gibran’s The Prophet and was one we chose together:
“Then Almitra spoke again and said, “And what of Marriage, master?”
And he answered saying:
You were born together, and together you shall be forevermore.
You shall be together when white wings of death scatter your days.
Aye, you shall be together even in the silent memory of God.
But let there be spaces in your togetherness,
And let the winds of the heavens dance between you.
Love one another but make not a bond of love:
Let it rather be a moving sea between the shores of your souls.
Fill each other’s cup but drink not from one cup.
Give one another of your bread but eat not from the same loaf.
Sing and dance together and be joyous, but let each one of you be alone,
Even as the strings of a lute are alone though they quiver with the same music.
Give your hearts, but not into each other’s keeping.
For only the hand of Life can contain your hearts.
And stand together, yet not too near together:
For the pillars of the temple stand apart,
And the oak tree and the cypress grow not in each other’s shadow”
That day, we were full of romance and idealism and probably didn’t think too much of this reading, but today 13 years later it is the sentiment here that our marriage is built upon.
This painting I created back in 2009 reminds me so much of our beautiful separateness. On this day, the Hubby and I set out to explore Zion National Park in the way we always have…together, but separate. We rode the shuttle to a perfect spot, stepped off and sized up our surroundings. He walked with me down to the river to find my perfect painting stop, sat on a boulder nearby as I set up, deciding where he would hike to while I painted. Hours passed as the sun belted down. My brushed moved quickly and before I knew it this painting had come into view. Before I knew it, Adam was back from his hike and we just sat for a while, sharing each of our adventures, laughing and laying back against the cool rocks to soak it all in. We didn’t need to be holding hand for hours or walking together along a path only one of us really wanted to be on. We could be at peace in the momentary separateness each of us craved; the sweet separateness that makes coming back together so divine.
Happy, happy 13th.
We never say thank you enough, wouldn’t you agree? Those two words are off-the-charts-powerful when used well and let’s face it, somewhat consistently. Adam and I are going on 13 years married and there’s something I’ve noticed… he always says “thank you”. Of course, we’re trained by well intentioned parents to say thank you for the obvious, like receiving a gift or having the door held for us ( I would hope). The hubby though, makes a habit of thanking me for even the mundane…like a simple dinner cooked hurriedly on any given Monday night. Those two very simple words feel so good. In one instant I can feel appreciated, understood and respected. Two little words.
So I’m encouraging you along with myself, to say thank you more often. Watch what happens.
God gave you a gift of 86,400 seconds today. Have you used one to say “thank you”? – William Arthur Ward #bossa2013 Curious about Bossa, follow the hashtag on instagram.
One year we literally forgot to put away our mistletoe. Amidst the insane amount of Christmas decor take-down, we just missed it and I’m so glad we did.
At first it was the running joke in our house…friends and family made fun of our silly display of household neglect…I can’t remember if it was me or Adam but one day in mid-spring, we landed under our year round reminder of Christmas past, not on purpose but because we were passing through at nearly the same time. One of us stopped and said look up. You can guess what came next.
That out of season mistletoe kiss led to many more. Admittedly most of our mistletoe kisses now are on purpose. Maybe I call him over, maybe he grabs my arm and pulls me under…it’s like that green ball hanging between our living room and kitchen is a reminder to slow down at the busiest stop in our home. Our mistletoe urges a moment of slow down, a chance to seek out one another… to choose a moment to love a little.
To this day, years later we’ve never taken down the mistletoe. No mistake.
Sometimes silly makes the most sense.
Creative in Love is a new series on the RiceInk blog…to get caught up read here!
So today marks the first official new series of posts on RiceInk. If you’ve never visited here before or haven’t read up since last year, you may want to start with this post. My New Year’s intentions involved a bit of change on this blog and this post fills you in on all the details!
I’ve been blogging for years…in the beginning my posts were incredibly sporadic and I often only shared artwork and other Momental related projects. Over the years I introduced everyone gradually to the Hubby, otherwise known as Adam. The Hubby makes a somewhat regular appearance on my blog here and there when my mood strikes, but this year I plan to change that and here’s why…
Weddings have become a widespread reason to dive deep into all the pretty details – the minutia of color palettes, flowers and what-not that so many blogs (including my own) have built their content around. So I wondered is there room for marriage on our blogs? What is happening to these pretty couples, marrying in pretty locations and moving into pretty homes?
I hope so.
Don’t get me wrong there is nothing more exciting to me than creating art for a couple that really means something. The kind of art they can’t wait to show off to their guests; art they want to hang on their walls….I will never turn my back on the pretty and detail of weddings…never. I do however believe we need to nourish our decor-minded approach to weddings just as much as our approach to marriage. Marriage being what happens after the wedding – the reality of trying to love someone everyday, give more than take and laugh more than cry.
My marriage is what I’m most proud of. It is my greatest accomplishment, mostly because it is always challenging me. It’s never perfect…never… but it works. I can articulate many reasons why Adam and I work…but a lot of why we are still going strong is unexplainable – something I can’t put into words. Perhaps if you got to know us better you could see it and understand.
So our story begins simply. I was in ninth grade he was in eleventh. Yes, that’s right, we met in high school. I fell fast an hard for the big eyed, slightly dorky Junior who saved me from a nightmare date at homecoming that year. We met over a long line for the water fountain. Adam was a gentleman from day 1. My date to homecoming was horrible and his rude behavior included cutting in line to grab a drink just as it was my turn. Adam stepped in and had some words for my suitor. We spent a good part of that night chatting and laughing while my date disappeared somewhere, thankfully.
Oddly it wasn’t until years later, after being good friends for a while that we started dating…
Once we became a couple though, there was no looking back. Our relationship traveled to Penn State for two years and then we were long-distance-in-love for another two while I finished my degree…the rest is history and well being reserved for some fun blog posts coming up!
This coming May Adam and I will celebrate 13 years of marriage and this year I plan to share more of us on this blog. Don’t expect marriage advice or anything – we’re not that good…but just sweet stories of how we love and give in our lives everyday or at least how we try…